KAT VELLOS
CONNECTION CATALYST
Heyyo! I’m Kat Vellos, a speaker, facilitator, certified connection coach, and the author and illustrator of We Should Get Together: The Secret to Cultivating Better Friendships.
I help adults make and keep friends while riding the rollercoaster of modern life, and I help companies retain staff by helping them cultivate feelings of belonging and connection at work (no karaoke necessary!) I speak in person and virtually, and my writing is read in over 100 countries.
Are you wandering in the adulthood friendship desert? It doesn’t have to be that way. You deserve to revel in the joy of amazing friendships, healthy work teams, and thriving communities.
I’d love to connect! Companies can learn more about my services and book me here, and individual peeps can hop on my newsletter and get on the waitlist for the next cohort of Platonic Action Lab™.
How I built this
I used to do UX research and design at Pandora, Slack, and some scrappy stealthy startups that later sold to bigger companies. As a UXer, it was fun and exciting to help millions of people find music they love, enjoy work a lot more, and get sh*t done with greater efficiency. While I loved making software more user-friendly (and the unlimited kombucha was a lovely perk), I had bigger goals: making life more friendly for the millions of people around the globe suffering from loneliness and disconnection.
I care about people and I’m a design practitioner, so I applied the UX research and design process to answer the question: “How might we design a better experience of adult friendship so that we can eradicate the loneliness epidemic?”
That led me to write my book, We Should Get Together: The Secret to Cultivating Better Friendship. And my book led me here. 💁🏾♀️
I was certified as a facilitator in 2005 and as a coach in 2020. The work I do now is a perfect blend of all my professional experience over the last 20 years.
Team Murthy 🙌🏾
I’m on Team Murthy all the way. The U.S. Surgeon General, Dr. Vivek H. Murthy, has declared loneliness a public health crisis, and the only way to solve it is with real connection.
Even though adult friendship can feel hard AF sometimes, I believe that unlocking the joy of friendship and community can be easier than you think. And, if we all collectively succeed, we’ll create a stronger, healthier world — and have a lot more fun along the way.
My mission is to give you the tools, inspiration, and motivation to create the platonic connection that you want and very much deserve — in both your personal and professional life.
Recipient of Design Bay Area’s 2022 Shine Award 🏆
The Shine Awards began in 2021 to honor and give visibility to individuals who work and live in the Bay Area who consistently use their skills, resources, and talents as a positive force to benefit others to give back to the Bay Area Community. Honorees were selfless and giving of their time.
Kat Vellos was awarded the Shine Award for outstanding generosity, commitment, and contributions to the design community in the Bay Area, California.
What I’ve Got For Ya
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Tools for Connection
Books about friendship, conversation starter cards, conversation-starter calendars, workshop replays, connection jet packs, affirmation cards, and more.
New goodies are added to the shop regularly because my idea list is five lifetimes long.
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Talks and Workshops
Keynote talks, fireside chats, team-bonding workshops, and special connection-boosting sessions.
Virtual or in-person events that can be brought to your company, conference, community group, retreat center, or artisan chocolate trade association. ;)
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Platonic Action Lab ™
This two-month group program will help you get HYPERSPECIFIC and HYPERLOCAL to cultivate friendships and build community. As one of our successful alumni says, “If you dream of having: more friends, better friends, a good community - PAL is a fantastic foundation for big dreams. Come be a part of it!
My best content is in my newsletter, but Instagram still has its clutches on me
Fun facts. And fact facts.
NEWEST HOBBY
Learning to pull yarn into the loops called stitches and purls. I decided to learn how to knit specifically so that I can one day create a gorgeous sweater that Pinterest showed me the pattern for one winter evening.
IN MY HEADPHONES THESE DAYS
Arlo Parks, Jessie Ware, Sam Smith, Omara Portuondo, and Steve Lacey
WEIRD QUIRK
I love flossing. Strange, I know!
FAVORITE CONVERSATION STARTER
I adore hearing any question that I’ve never been asked before or that makes me laugh, pause, reflect, form a new neural pathway, or think about something in an entirely new way.
LEAST-FAVORITE CONVERSATION STARTER
“How are you?” — This greeting disguised as a question is one of my least favorite strings of words, for so many reasons.
MOST ADVENTUROUS THING I’VE EVER DONE
Walked on hot coals! On purpose! Didn’t get burned!
Fact facts: I’m a queer Black woman (she/her) 🏳️🌈 ✊🏾 living on unceded Huichin, Chochenyo, Ohlone territory. I’m native to the North/Central American landmass, and an immigrant to the United States, and I’ve lived in a lot of places, so the idea of a single hometown has never resonated with me — this is one reason why I hate the question “where are you from?” My intersectional perspective on the topic of connection is informed by A) my lived experience as a person whose natural state of being is often politicized and discriminated against, and B) my career journey through the educational, media, non-profit, and tech worlds. I’m an introvert, an earth sign, and an ISTJ, and I think of that as a wonderful balance. 💁🏾♀️